An organization designed for dads

Eric J. Tamblin sees a lot of "disconnect" between fathers and their children these days.

"When I was younger, everything was black and white," the 34-year-old Adams resident said. "Now, there's a lot of gray areas children experience."

A new group designed for fathers offers an opportunity for fathers to share experiences, learn new parenting techniques, meet other dads and shed light on those gray areas.

The Dads Group will host its first meeting Wednesday at Cornell Cooperative Extension of Jefferson County, 203 N. Hamilton St. The group then will meet every other Wednesday.

The program is sponsored by the county Cooperative Extension through the New York State Parent Information and Resource Center.

The group also will welcome children of all ages, from toddlers to teens, for activities and field trips. Meetings will alternate for dads only and for dads and children. The first meeting Wednesday will be for fathers only.

Daniel J. Munroe, family educator for the Families and Communities Together with Schools (FACTS) program, said the curriculum of the Dads Group will include the meaning of masculinity, handling emotion, discipline and punishment.

"The first meeting will be a time to go over the curriculum and have an open discussion," Mr. Munroe said. "We'll open it up and see where dads take it."

Some stereotypes will be addressed.

"The stereotypical image of a dad is that he must be stone-faced," Mr. Munroe said. "But dads can show emotion."

"Long-distance fathering and being able to reconnect after a deployment will also be covered," he said.

Mr. Munroe said long-distance fathering doesn't relate to military dads only, but also could include fathers whose jobs take them on the road.

Mr. Tamblin is a facilitator for the Dads Group. He and his wife, Jennifer, are the parents of four children, ages 1, 2, 5 and 12.

He had a job as a cell phone tower installer and was living in New Jersey, but in 2006 he fell 25 feet while installing a swing in a tree for a friend. He broke his back and has been a stay-at-home dad since. The Adams resident, who was born in Watertown, returned to the north country in 2007 to be closer to family.

Mr. Tamblin is a volunteer for parental groups and Community Action Planning Council's Head Start, is on the advisory committee for the FACTS program and often volunteers in his younger children's preschool classrooms.

"Most of the activities I've been to have only women in attendance, and I was the only guy there," Mr. Tamblin said. "It'll be nice to get a good turnout for the Dads Group."

He added, "We don't want to sit around and tell fathers how they should raise their kids. It will be a group where you can get comfortable and to get new ideas and how to deal with new situations."

Since different ages of children and teens require different challenges, those new situations and related discussions could be vast, Mr. Tamblin noted.

"It will be a good way for dads to get together and bounce ideas off each other," Mr. Tamblin said, "especially if you're a dad who puts your feelings in your pocket."

The group also will be beneficial when fathers and children get together for the meetings, he said.

"There are so many things children hear and see today that we didn't see and hear at those ages," Mr. Tamblin said.